Are you a happy wife, happy life kind of gal? How is the atmosphere in your home? Do you blame your kids or husband when you are having a bad day? When someone doesn’t do what you want them to do they fear the consequences? Do you recognize when you are being selfish? We all struggle with selfishness. Every one of us. Proverbs 21:9 says “It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.” Proverbs 21:19 “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.”
I won’t teach my sons or daughter the phrase “Happy wife, happy life” I won’t use it in our home. Why? It shows my sons that they have to work to make someone else happy. I won’t teach my sons that they have to walk around on eggshells for a woman because he isn’t doing what she wants. It shows my daughter that if she throws a big enough fit she will get her way. It tells her that her happiness depends on what a man gives her or does for her. That is untrue and an unhealthy mindset to have.
To be happy is a choice. You find joy in the love of God. It is not our job to fulfill another or to be filled by a person. Don’t put that stress on your husband or yourself. Don’t teach that to your children. We are complete when we know the Saviour not when we find our soul mate. Yes, we should want to do nice things for our spouse and we should like when they do something for us. It is when we expect our husband to cater to our wants and make him pay when he doesn’t. That is a sign of a selfish marriage. We should never put expectations on our loved ones that are unreasonable.
How do we show our children to have an unselfish marriage? To not have the mindset that their spouse’s job is to complete them. Simply, be an example. Being unselfish towards our spouse. Towards our children. By not having a demanding attitude. By respecting one another. Husband and wife alike. Cherishing one another. Laughing together in the hard times, not just the easy. Saying nice things about one another especially when the other isn’t around. Doing little acts of kindness for your spouse. Teach them that it’s better to give than to receive. When something doesn’t go your way let your husband off the hook. Smile at him instead of scowling. Be understanding instead of critical. Speak a soft word instead of an angry one. Most importantly, have a relationship with Jesus Christ. When we are not happy with our life we need to turn to our Saviour. We need to pray and dig into our Bibles. Our children will see and they will take notice. Let us show our children to resist the temptation to be all about me. Throw the happy wife, happy life out the door and appreciate what you have.